I am perfectly capable of talking to people, but only on my terms. I have to set up the interaction.
If I see them suddenly, out and about, I get flustered and weird and I usually turn bright red. Not because I have crushes on absolutely everyone I know and run into by chance, but because I am not smooth enough to just say "Oh, hey. How's it going?" Well I do say that, it's just at a really high pitch and super fast.
So to combat that ordeal, I pretend to talk on the phone. A LOT. I've been doing this for years, since high school, when I just really do not want to talk to people. (Real people.) The thing is, I've gotten really good at it.
One time my boyfriend called me when I was at a bar. After we hung up the phone, there were some really shady guys looking at me by the front doorway, so I continued talking. I said something like "Yeah, Monday. What? But that's when we have to have the meeting, she already told him about it."
I talked like that for awhile, and all of a sudden I hear, "Heather?"
My boyfriend was listening the entire time. I was totally found out. All he said was "Wow, you're really good at that."
I'll even make up fake names, usually Tim or Ashley (I have no super close friends by those names), and pretend I have a party to go to or something. To make me sound cool. That was more of the theme in high school.
Also, my friend reminded me of this yesterday. Remember inflatable furniture?
Ohhh yeah. Except (and this, unfortunately, isn't a joke), I didn't have a Barbie Chair.
Mine was Jar Jar Binks.
Enjoy your Wednesday!